21 - 27 December 2009

We seem to be mixing our festivals into a huge Christmas pudding of confusion. Saint Nicholas comes on 6 December. Saint Nick/Santa Claus/Father Christmas, surely, just coming a little earlier, with his white beard, red coat and big sack, to ease the load of Christmas eve? No, St Nicholas is an old bishop. The Weihnachtsmann is Father Christmas and he really only visits children who has been televisually and internationally corrupted. Innocent Austrian children, unpolluted by foreign custom are visited by the Christkind. The Christ child/Jesus? No, a beautiful angel with curly hair who brings presents and decorates the Christmas tree on Christmas eve. What on earth was the Christkind doing visiting our house before the 24th?, the children's friends wanted to know, on seeing our beautifully decorated tree well in advance of Christmas eve. In the end both Father Christmas and the Christkind visited our house and left a little note explaining how much they had enjoyed working together.

14 - 20 December 2009

Caspar's birthday was celebrated this week, a little late, but with much hilarity and bruising on the ice rink at Zell am See with friends. Wasn't quite so much fun a few days later when we enthusiastically and confidently ran onto the ice rink and 2 minutes later ran back off again to take Caspar to hospital with a split chin, bloodied nose and half a tooth missing. The chin and tooth (which we found after much searching) were both glued together again, and Justine, Nina, Mary and Elizabeth enjoyed a skate while Simon and Caspar were at the hospital, only slightly marred by the blood besplattered ice-rink that Caspar had left to remind us of him.

7 - 13 December 2009

As the ski season opens with a distinct lack of snow, Hochkönig's recent 12 million euro investment of snow making facilities comes into it's own. Snow pours from lances dotted all over the mountains. And then the Föhn arrives, a warm, strong, dry down-slope wind which often blows this way, also known as the 'snow-eater'. The temperatures went from minus 12 to plus 13 in twelve hours and the snow melted away. This particular wind can also cause migraines and psychosis. Justine usually gets the migraine and Simon thinks that Justine gets the psychosis too. So on the whole the Föhn is not very welcome.

30 November - 6 December 2009

Simon is finding his latest English conversation class quite challenging. Covering topical, political, social and scientific issues, and often the exchange of good recipes, his English as well as German vocabulary is regularly tested. Last week's discussion, on the topic of clock-making, involved the pros and cons of the double three-legged gravity escapement. Our children, meanwhile, are mixing their language delightfully. Elizabeth complained to us today that Mary had 'broken her feeling'.

23 - 29 November 2009

Caspar got new neighbours for his 9th birthday on 27 November. They came with the new apartment. Simon lullabyes our children to sleep each evening on the piano, and on the floor below, our neighbours congregate in their children's bedroom, directly under the piano, to listen in. (Simon and Justine have lovely memories of being similarly lullabyed by their mums as children.) As well as the music, we expect they enjoy the peace after the patter, or thundering, of not so tiny anymore feet, finally ceases.

16 - 22 November 2009

I am writing this blog 8 weeks late, sorry! Since we came back from England, with everything we own in a Luton van, we have, amongst other things, moved house, entertained visitors, celebrated birthdays, sung in concerts, done Christmas, skiied and started winter work. Today is the first day of the New Year, and we are exhausted, but resolved to keep up to date with blogs and photos!

9 - 15 November 2009

A wonderful week in dear old Blighty to celebrate Marisa's 40th, Neb's 70th, gather together with family and gather together belongings that survived the epic clear out two years ago, for our move to a new, unfurnished apartment. The children are very obviously out of sitting-in-a-car practice, (we use the car once a week for a 10 minute drive to accordian and violin lessons, and perhaps once a fortnight for an outing). Most trips in our hire car this week were accompanied by a bit of bickering and a bag of sick.

2 - 8 November 2009

As we relaxed, recently, in a local pub, the Under 14's Maria Alm football team arrived, in high spirits, to celebrate their recent win. Their trainer, perhaps knowing no other means of celebrating, ordered a round of schnapps, which the proprietor served, obligingly and unquestioningly. Or, so we thought. They were in fact drinking Sprite - just training. They then switched to their pints of coke and practised noisy, incomprehensible football chants and grunting noises. In the other corner of the bar was a group of local lads, who may well have been doing the same half a century ago - just training, and, it appears, are now topping the league tables in the sport of heavy drinking. That didn't seem to anyone to be something to celebrate.

26 October - 1 November 2009

Weltspartag (World Savings Day) was established in 1924 to raise awareness of the importance of saving money, personally, and for the economy. It has been celebrated for decades around the world on 31 October, but has dwindled lately as the recent age of virtual money makes the physical process of collecting coins less relevant. Still celebrated with gusto here, the two banks in Maria Alm provided bouncy castle, balloons, sweets, coffee and cakes, and money boxes for the children which come without a key. If they want to open it they must visit the bank, if they do so on Weltspartag they get freebies galore. What more motivation do children need, to persuade them to save for a whole year, than to receive truck loads of stuff that they never knew they needed. The children were giddy with delight. Justine and Simon would have rather received, for their good, responsible practice and huge contribution to the world economy, a nice fat bankers bonus.

19 - 25 October 2009

Kit - an essential part of the skiing experience. The well-heeled could spend £1800 on the world's most expensive skis, £795 on the world's most expensive ski boots, a pair of gloves can set you back well over £100 and the sky's the limit for sunglasses. Or you could get the entire kit for less than 30€ if you go to one of the many local 'tauschbösen' (sell your old kit and buy someone else's old kit) that take place at this time of year when everyone starts feeling the cold. We sold unwanted langlauf skis and bought much desired ice-skates.

12 - 18 October 2009

A word about our youngest. Each Sunday she is given a few coins to put in the church collection, usually collected by Caspar in his role as (probably) the only Anglican altar-boy in the Catholic church. As the basket moves along the pew towards us her grip tightens on the coins in her small hand. We exchange glances as it is passed to us and a look of panic comes into her eyes. She loosens her grip on one coin and looks questioningly at us. She puts her head in her hands and considers her options - (our neighbours on the pew wait patiently for the basket to be passed on, and politely ignore the argy-bargy going on) the second coin is dropped in the basket. To release the third coin, we grab her wrist and shake until her grip loosens again. After the service she is usually to be found still fondling the fourth coin. We explain how some children have no home, no toys, no food, no parents, etc. and when she is sure that they have absolutely nothing, she drops the final coin into the collection box before skipping off to tell anyone she can find that she has been helping the poor.

5 - 11 October 2009

Justine now has 16 beginner recorder pupils. As if that were not enough to give her a headache, the note B, in German, is not called B. B is B flat, and H is B. A long time ago the notes of the scale were named after the alphabet but the B natural was often softened to a B flat. A round letter B came to signify B flat, and a square B for B natural. The square B, for B natural, came to be mistaken for an H, and is called so today, a clerical error that has perpetuated over 1000 years. A further complication for Justine is that the recorder is called a Flöte (Flute) which she can't pronounce, and finds herself suggesting that we all play the 'Flirt'(which means the same in German as in English). It'll be a strange musical education for these children.

28 September - 4 October 2009

The new vicar was recently officially introduced, in a public ceremony, to all the clubs and organisations in the village. Each welcomed him in the traditional manner, with a schnapps. After about 8 of them in the space of 10 minutes they were possibly not so welcome. So there's another reason against shared parishes, paramedics will need to be on standby if the next vicar, who is also likely to be elderly because most of them are now, must be officially welcomed in the traditional manner by clubs and organisations from three parishes. I'm not sure that downing about 20 schnapps one after the other is in the job description for Catholic Priest.

21 - 27 September 2009

Full time, year round jobs are not easy to find in Maria Alm, but there will be one up for grabs in a couple of years time when the current incumbent retires (he has actually only just arrived but will only be with us for two years). It comes with fantastic accommodation, secretary, house-keeper and huge prestige. You get one day off a week but must work every single bank holiday including Christmas and Easter and be on-call 24/7. And ... you must be male, celibate and ordained as a Catholic priest, which appears to be a sticking point. There is a massive shortage of potential candidates, and as a result the next Maria Alm vicar, if they can find one, will have to manage the shared parish of Maria Alm and Hinthertal and, newly merged, that of Leogang, a town 13km away.

14 - 20 September 2009

After Caspar's first day at school in England, at 4 going on 5, he told us that he had had a very nice time but didn't think he would go again. It was some task helping him to understand that this was something that he would have to do for the next 11 years of his life. Mary had her first day at school this week at the age of 6 going on 7, and it was a joy sending a child to school who understood what was expected of her, and went with eagerness and confidence. We are entirely convinced that most of the countries in the world, who favour a school starting age of 6, have got it right. We are also entirely convinced that 10 weeks Summer holiday is 2 weeks too long!

7 - 13 September 2009

Working life here is mainly concerned with tourism or farming, and both make good use of the mountains. The usefulness of mountains also extends to curing just about any ailment you care to mention. For high blood pressure try amethyst, or essence of turquoise for rheumatism. Justine, very sceptically, tried aquamarine for her hayfever and discovered it to be a miracle cure. The firmly held belief in the healing properties of stones, keeps Justine's working life ticking over, meeting the huge demand for necklaces, earrings and bracelets crafted from these 'edelstein' (noble stones).

31 August - 6 September 2009

On Friday Caspar took part in another of those 'fun' sporting events that every one, except us, takes very seriously. A real endurance test for the spectators who stood for 3 hours, in rain so heavy you could barely stand erect in it. For the competitors - a 50m metre swim, quick dash to put trainers on, followed by 400m run. The fastest managed it in just over 3 minutes. Caspar came in second to last with a time of 5 mins 6 secs and we reckon that it took him about 2 minutes to tie his shoe laces, it felt like 10! He is delighted with his huge medal, t-shirt and bag of goodies for taking part and is up for it again next year, but would like trainers with velcro fastenings.

24 - 30 August 2009

'Oschauscheich' is a Pinzgau word which breaks down thus: 'Obi', meaning 'down', which in German is 'runter', is shortened to 'O'. Then comes 'schau' which is German for 'to look' (schauen). Then 'scheich' which is 'scheu' in German, meaning 'shy'. So 'shy of looking down', which finally translates as 'afraid of heights' and makes absolutely no sense to a German speaker because the word they would use is 'höhenängstlich'. Simon wears a t-shirt with this emblazoned on the front when he is working on the high ropes course.

17 - 23 August 2009

It could have been a perfect day on Thursday, the warmth of the sun in a clear blue sky was tempered by a fresh mountain breeze. But almost everyone from the village had gathered in the church yard to bury a little girl who had been accidently run over by her father. We knew her only by sight, but were engulfed by the huge wave of grief that left everyone here reeling in it's wake.

10 - 16 August 2009

On the grand scale, everything in this world is in motion, traveling at different speeds, and on different ellipses, moving apart and drawing close again. And on our tiny familiar scale, journeying on our own ellipse, we hope we will sometime draw closer to beloved family and friends moving on their own elliptical paths. Best not to rue the distance, but keep looking out for where we all are, so that we are not unfamiliar to each other when we eventually draw close again.

3 - 9 August 2009

One day this week, Caspar decided to swim and not stop. Up and down, up and down - Justine, Elizabeth and Mary can confirm that long-distance swimming is not a spectator sport. 1000 metres was his goal, and after 1100m Simon managed to convince Caspar that 1000m didn't mean 1000 lengths, so he got out. He went to the front desk to get his 1000m badge only to discover that they had not gone metric and only had a mile badge. Unperturbed, he was ready to jump back in for a further 16 lengths to win the mile badge. When he learnt that he had to start all over again he went home and cried himself into exhausted sleep. Justine and Simon didn't know how to console him and decided that it was just a tough lesson in dealing with disappointment (which really would have been absolutely no consolation for Caspar), when Simon's mum reminded us that we could have got him the 800m badge (doh!!!) and cycled back to the swimming pool to claim the prize before he had even woken up. This is now sewed proudly in the Caspar corner of Simon's old scout camping blanket.

27 July - 2 August 2009

Simon and Justine consider the ringing of church bells to be a glorious sound and can often be found at the end of the ropes when visiting England. It's the sort of sound that becomes part of life if heard on a regular basis, it doesn't disturb and it is noticed if absent, like planes if you live under the flight path, seagulls if you live by the sea, or the Maria Alm church clock if you live in Maria Alm (which incidentally was only temporarily broken - see 1 - 7 June). We visited several towers this week and recognise that now may be a troubling time for this 500 year old, almost uniquely English, tradition. There are a lot of bells, not enough ringers to go round, it's hard work keeping them all swinging and efforts are often unappreciated or even unwelcome. But if the sound dies away and is no longer a part of the English sound-scape, the neighbours will really complain if, at a less troubled time, we try and get them ringing again. At this time of persecution we need to double our efforts and ring with yet more enthusiasm (if it is possible for bell-ringers to be even more enthusiastic about bell-ringing) and be grateful that we are not being thrown to the lions. We are sorry that we are not there to lend support.

20 - 26 July 2009

Are we losing our hardiness and resilience? Is the Austrian climate (temperatures of - 20c, electrical storms, flash flooding and lethal hail) making us soft? Our first weekend back in England and we were beaten by the Devonshire weather. After spending the best part of Sunday in the pub (not too much of a hardship), mopping up the river of rainwater flowing through the tent, dressing the children in pyjamas and damp towels because there were no other dry items of clothing, and almost collapsing from exhaustion from being so positive, we abandoned 16 hours early (we had already enjoyed two wonderful days on the beach). 'A plus' for effort for all campers, and I expect we were all quite relieved to be in bricks and mortar when the severe weather warnings were announced. The weather didn't make the slightest difference to any of the children, nor did the fact that they hadn't seen their friends for a year, they just picked up where they left off and played very happily all weekend.

13 - 19 July 2009

The Schernthaners, in whose house we live, are a very musical family. One can find a trombone, trumpet, accordian, guitar, harmonica or alphorn in most corners of the house. These are the instruments that one recognises as instruments, but Stefan could probably make music out of just about anything. This Sunday, he made a guest appearance at the Wildbacheck restaurant with Simon, Caspar and Justine, and gave a beautiful rendition of Edelweiss on the saw.

6 - 12 July 2009

Was that 15 - make it 16, of the 'not exactly qualified but I'll have a go' variety. He is leading people around the high ropes course - swinging through the trees at 50m on wobbly ropes, flying foxes and 30m high free fall jumps. He is entirely responsible for their safety and hopes he might get some training sometime soon.

29 June - 5 July 2009

Simon's jobs so far: ski instructor, tutor, english teacher, physics teacher, german teacher, translator, website design and maintenance, lawn mower, painter, caretaker, ski school administration, piano teacher, GCSE exam paper marking, pianist, and the latest - swim teacher. I think he may have given the impression that he'll have a go at anything, (just call him Jack), so he was approached to teach 27 Kindergarten children to swim. And most of them can now, with the exception of our very own Elizabeth who appears to have learnt nothing at all over the past 10 lessons and two weeks. Backstroke and underwater swimming (not the same as drowning), are the hallmarks of a Peberdy swim pupil, and we are looking forward to seeing them in the outdoor pool if it would only stop raining.

22 - 28 June 2009

Maria Alm is full of the sound of accordian music. Nothing new there, except that this time it's Scottish jigs and reels. 65 Scottish country dancers with a combined age of, at a guess, about 4500, some of them even from Scotland but most of them English, are literally whirling away the rain-soaked hours. We chanced upon them and they took a break from their eight by thirty-two Strathspeys and square sets to dance a few simple do-si-dos so that we could join in. A lively evening in the company of Virginia Reel, Gay Gordon and one local farmer who was really reeling. He frequently and loudly reitterated that it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen and showed his appreciation tangibly to all the ladies.

15 - 21 June 2009

Midsummer, and this past week it has rained day and night almost without interruption. June 21 is traditionally celebrated with mountain bonfires on every inch of the horizon and big firework displays. This year, additional celebrations were planned for the opening of the new high ropes course in Maria Alm. But Midsummer can't be postponed due to extremely bad weather, so it just wasn't celebrated. A massive disappointment for thousands of tourists and locals, perhaps not so disappointing for Dominic, whose car broke down on his way to catch his £5 Ryan Air Salzburg return flight. He missed his flight and enjoyed a week of English sunshine instead.

8 - 14 June 2009

The Fire Service here is run almost entirely voluntarily. Most of the village are involved and in an emergency they are summoned by an extremely loud siren which can be heard from all over. Three blasts and everyone leaps into action. At their annual party this weekend, children's activities included climbing a ladder to the roof of the Fire Station and abseiling across the road, piling as many children as possible into the cherry picker and elevating to 50 metres, filling a room with smoke and then playing hide and seek. None of that was risky enough for Mary who decided to scramble through a barbed wire fence and sustain a nasty gouge to the back of her leg. After a bit of discussion about where a first aid kit could be found, the firemen managed a bandage, but no dressing or antiseptic, so they wrapped the bandage around the uncleaned cut and secured it with a bit of sellotape. Mary skipped off to have a go in the car accident simulator.

1 - 7 June 2009

Something is changing in never-changing Maria Alm. Up until a year ago, the 500 year old church clock chimed and pealed day and night. Up until this week it chimed from 6.00am to 11.00pm with a hearty peal at the start of the day. Now the joyful 6.00am peal has been silenced. Since the bells are no longer waking everyone up, few are awake to notice this. Justine noticed and popped into the Tourist Office to discover the reason for it. The staff were up in arms to learn about the erosion of such a long-standing tradition and suspected it was due to pressure from Guest House and Hotel owners who must field regular complaints from their guests. They are sending a posse to the Vicarage to find out more. Watch this space!...

25 - 31 May 2009

Our move to Austria has been mostly seamless in red tape terms, but we've been well and truly tied up in it when it comes to the car. This week we finally achieved Austrian plates, having overcome hurdles such as - the make and model of our car does not exist, if it did exist it certainly wouldn't exist as an LPG conversion, if it is an LPG conversion then it certainly shouldn't have a tow bar. After a year's worth of fun phonecalls, faxes, emails and meetings it will cost us over £2000, plus a special bonus £50 for the huge dossier that the tax man has had to compile for our case.

18 - 24 May 2009

Apparently, Caspar has reached the age of reason, is without sin and in a state of grace! And you would have believed it too, when he took his Erstkommunion (First Communion) on Thursday. He looked and behaved like an angel in his white robe carrying his spring flowers. All the children, the girls with flowers in their hair, processed with the band to the church, sang songs, told stories and said prayers beautifully, and when we'd wiped away the tears we all sat at long tables in the sunshine and drank beer.

11 - 17 May 2009

It has been noted that in this staunchly catholic community, people regularly live together in cardinal sin and have children out of wedlock! And then they get married. Patterns of life here are repeated with little variation for generations. Daughters leave the family home when they marry, to share their husband's family home with him, his parents, unmarried siblings, occasional aunts, great grandparents, etc. If there is no son then there is no heir, and no one to look after you in your old age. Savvy farmers waited until the heir was produced before they committed themselves in marriage.

4 - 10 May 2009

In translating a health spa brochure, Simon has found it necessary to familiarise himself with the vocabulary of the beauty treatment world. Literal translations - 'the lovely smell of a warm package', 'kids grooming', 'hand job', 'tautening body envelopes' - have received a full makeover with optimum purification and detoxification; precious aromatic balsams and active enzymes have activated energies and facilitated manual lymphatic drainage of such dodgy expressions. As far as he is concerned, a uniquely harmonising and holistic translation for the lot is, 'a load of old bollocks'.

27 April - 3 May 2009

Summer attractions in Maria Alm include swimming, cycling, walking, tennis, climbing and the new high ropes course. The Summer clientele arrive in their bus loads...and in their 70's...and with their zimmer frames. They mostly eat apple strudel and look at the church.

20 - 26 April 2009

Children's TV is a great language learning resource. Justine feels very confident now at German level four year old, but feels obliged to watch telly with the children because much of it really ought to have a PG rating. Simon has to watch it too, so that Justine can hide behind him in the scary bits. Sunday afternoon Grimm's fairy tales are like remakes of the Blair Witch Project. Family viewing includes detailed diagrams of penetrative sex followed by full frontal childbirth. Granted, children should know where an egg comes from, but should they have to watch the little boy chicks being conveyerbelted to the big rubbish bin of death, or the little pink piggy jerking around following a massive electric shock, before it's blood gushes from its slit throat? Apparently, they should.

13 - 19 April 2009

After 40 days of abstinance, there is just not enough chocolate featured in Austria's Easter celebrations. Hard boiled eggs, that one should pick the grit out of after they've been dropped and crushed underfoot in the competitive rush of the egg and spoon race to make an egg mayonnaise sandwich as a nod to something that feels vaguely healthy when you've eaten so much chocolate that you really can't even manage that wafer thin mint, are the big treat of the day. They are deceptively brightly painted, but just not chocolatey enough. We are calling a national emergency and would welcome any donations to our home address.

6 - 12 April 2009

Justine choked on her well deserved beer, following her first ever full day of teaching non-beginners skiing, when an agitated man approached the ski-teachers' table to ask, 'I've been waiting for an hour, where is my 8 year old daughter?'. She was sure she'd counted them all at the end of the lesson. Fortunately, the tearful reunion took place moments later, and Justine's beer was still as cold as her blood had momentarily run. Full of good intentions, she set off enthusiastically with her group the next morning, only to receive a call, 20 minutes later, from her boss, who had a four year old with him that she'd left behind. Once Justine had learnt to count, the rest of the week went without a hitch.

30 March - 5 April 2009

For those resort workers who survived the winter uninjured, 'Zipferl Bob' - the end of season event, a perfect blend of drink and danger - provided a final opportunity to be helicoptered off the mountain. We played Russian Roulette with our coccyxs on every curve, corner and hummock of this bum boarding Cresta Run, and then skillfully skirted the far more dangerous sport of mixing schnapps and beer, to go home, all intact, for a nice cup of tea. Although, sometimes, we like to think we can handle the pace, one need's to know when to opt out!

23 - 29 March 2009

A fit of competitive enthusiasm resulted in Justine, Caspar and Simon signing up for a langlauf race on Sunday, having been persuaded it was 'only for fun' and it 'didn't matter at all' that Justine had never tried it before and Simon only once. When Simon was otherwise detained, Kate drew the short straw and stepped in to find herself at the starting line with 20 lycra clad muscle-men. She then embarked on a torturous lap of extreme physical pain, endurance and humiliation. The humiliation part got progressively worse until Tom, who raced third in the relay-team, found himself some considerable distance behind the second to last competitor, cheered on with hup, hup, hups from well-meaning supporters. Each team bearing an English competitor came most definitely last. So we know better now, even though they say it is just for fun, the Austrian's take langlauf quite seriously, which explains their very distinctive body shape - enormous thighs and buttocks. And where was Simon? Teaching a private ski lesson in the pouring rain in Russian. Infinitely preferable.

16 - 22 March 2009

This time last year Justine took part in the Hausfrau Rennen. One year on and it seems that all the practice put in, knocking back schnapps, knocking in nails, slalom racing and kissing old men, paid off and she came third! Fellow racer Jan achieved a very respectable last place, having put her skis on for the first time this year. The icing on the cake was a stupendous tombola win for Justine - 80 rolls of toilet roll!

9 - 15 March 2009

Do you find you do everything wrong when skiing? Is your weight on the uphill ski not the downhill, do you swing your body when you turn, are your arms all over the place, is your upper body too upright, your weight too far back? Then Telemark is for you - just do the complete opposite of everything that you've been taught in skiing and you can achieve that graceful, balletic style that draws gasps of wonder from chair-lift audiences. Invite 6 ski instructors, who are twice weekly subjected to ski brain-washing training sessions, to have a go, and they get very confused, go into melt-down and prance around the piste before retiring, not at all gracefully, into the Almhütte to drink, and talk about how they really felt they were starting to get the hang of it.

2 - 8 March 2009

'Fasching Dienstag' is Mardi Gras/Shrove Tuesday. This festive time is celebrated in the usual fashion (beer, music, sauerkraut) but with the added bonus of everyone dressing up in anything slightly more ridiculous than lederhosen, and eating Krapfen (doughnuts). It is followed by the Lent period of fasting, restraint and contemplation...not too much in evidence around here if we're totally honest!

23 February - 1 March 2008

Ziachschlitternfahrn is the unpronouncable Maria Alm equivalent of a steam rally (Simon's kind of scene). Vintage sledges of such variety of style and purpose are annually dusted off, proudly displayed, very nearly completely trashed when raced at break-neck speeds down the Jufen rodelbahn, and judged for their authenticity, condition and load. Great care is taken over every detail; a 'going to church on a Sunday' sledge must carry the whole family all appropriately dressed with a suitable snack in the hamper, a 'kebab van' sledge carries everything from the kitchen, including the kitchen sink, and plenty of steaming sauerkraut, an 'ambulance' sledge has a double bed, furs, blankets and knives (presumably for emergency amputations), the carpenters sledge has a complete compliment of tools all lovingly sharpened and oiled. The event takes the usual formula - drink beer, play music, eat food, do something very dangerous.

16 - 22 February 2009

A week of excess. Snow - since most of Justine's charges barely measure a metre, and on Tuesday 70cm of snow fell in the space of a ski lesson, attempts at skiing were heroic (Libby's attempts pictured here). Travel time - Berkshire to Maria Alm by minibus in 24 hours, a experience our recent visitors, the Ainger and Rogers families, would not like to repeat. Visitors - 13 in one week, 9 of them residing in the house (including our own extensive range of ski equipment, that amounted to 56 skis in our garage). Food - a modest shopping list, requested of Nicola, translated into 8 boxes of cereal, 24 bottles of beer, 12 bottles of wine, a few kilos of chocolate and cheese, a year's supply of custard powder, 240 tea bags and a whole side of honey roast ham. And fun, which you can never have an excess of, in abundance.

9 - 15 February 2008

If you turn right at the top of the T-bar on Natrun, you can ski through the Tierpark (animal park), slaloming around deer, fox, wild boar and lynx, (remarkably life-like models, apart from the fact that they all have targets on the side of them, for archery practice). Until recently, they had been left in waiting at the side of the piste until the snow was deep enough to firmly position them in. Some imaginative, free thinking, young types, (word has it they were snow-boarders), carefully arranged them in poses that contravened all laws of nature and, frankly, made this area of the ski piste entirely unsuitable for family skiing. Action was immediately taken to disentangle this orgiastic muddle, and order and respectablility were quickly restored. (photo withheld.)

2 - 8 February 2009

Heavy snow, in England and Austria, has been disrupting travel. Recent visitors, Kate and Jon, enjoyed an unexpected 24 hours at Stansted airport. The Maria Almers may have been concerned that the Wise Men had been similarly delayed and not reached Jesus by Twelfth Night, so the Christmas decorations and white advent lights, gently illuminating the village and showing the Magi the way, have only just been taken down. We'd had enough of ours a month ago and think the January 6 rule is highly practical. For the sake of integration, we compromised and banished our Christmas tree to the garden with the lights still on it. As I've undoubtedly previously mentioned, traditions here are stringently, perhaps even on pain of public accusation and humiliation, upheld. So you can bet that if they do things a little differently here, it's because that's how it has always been done. Taking the decorations down on Candlemas (February 2) is a tradition that dates back way before the Twelfth Night tradition.

26 January - 1 February 2009

After 6 hours of back to back private ski lessons, Simon decided to get his feet out of his ski boots and do some snow boarding. Soon after that we went to the hospital. Caspar and the director of the ski school both suggested that he might just about get away with snowboarding, but he was too old to be attempting the box jump in the snow park! So he took the rest of the week off work while the pulled ligaments in his shoulder repaired themselves. 4 days with only the use of his right hand - he spent some time developing his newly-found artistic skills. 4 days with Simon at home looking after the children - Justine spent some time learning to snowboard, and practising the box jump (on skis).

19 - 25 January 2009

It's not always a picnic for children here. When Caspar makes a mistake in his homework it comes back with big red crossings out and a little picture of a very angry face, no sentimentality spared. There's also not much evidence of 'everyone's a winner', 'it's the taking part that counts'. Here, if you haven't won then you've lost. Yesterday, a local ski race for local people started at 5.30pm with the children's categories. It was a big deal for little children, some as young as three, with floodlit piste, tannoy, video wall, starting gates, big crowd etc. Once they had survived this ordeal, and a few of them, including Mary, lost their nerve and burst into tears, they then waited three hours to find out how they'd done in anticipation of receiving a little something to reward their efforts. But, unless they'd made it into the top five they got nothing, not even a mention. We would have had a major tantrum on our hands since we had assured Elizabeth that she would receive a certificate, a medal, probably a packet of sweets (since they are so ready to give them out when the childen so much as step into the post office/bank/supermarket.) Happily, that evening we were blessed. Elizabeth got fifth place, a certificate and a medal. Caspar came eleventh in his category but won a brand new pair of free-style twin tip skis, just his size, in the prize draw. And Mary, at the last minute pulled herself together and raced down to scoop the coveted first prize of a hideous trophy which is now on display in our home.

12 - 18 January 2009

As far as Justine is concerned you can keep your Swiss chocolate - there is nothing that compares with a bit of Fruit and Nut. She welcomes any visitor that comes with a little bar tucked somewhere in the hand luggage. This week brought three visitors, Jon, Ellie and Dom, bearing the usual supplies, as well as Christmas gifts. That amounted to 1 kilo 600 grammes of chocolate which Justine managed to consume within the week!

5 - 11 January 2009

We love having visitors, but when they leave we usually have a few days of hell from our children, who are wondering where all the attention has gone. After a particularly testing day, Justine relayed to Simon each child's individual achievements when he came back from work. Each one had prompted a major loss of temper on Justine's part. Elizabeth listened with interest and then asked, 'was I the naughtiest?'. Simon and Justine agreed that, on this occasion, she had really excelled herself and surpassed even Mary and Caspar's efforts combined. And then we saw it, a look of triumph - fleeting and disguised, but it was there! So now we know - it's a competition! When we think the children are sleeping sweetly they are planning competition stratagems and rules, and they probably have prize-giving the following night. Love 'em!

29 December 2008 - 4 January 2009

In honour of Simon's birthday, (or maybe it was for New Year's Eve), the ski instructors partied at the top of the mountain and then skiied down (drunk, in the dark, holding burning torches - sensible). Here we all are with many of our Danish colleagues (they are the blond beautiful ones). Another nation that flocks to Maria Alm, so much so that many of the ski instructors the Ski School employ are Danish. One can tell a Dane by their name - somewhere in this crowd are Moe, Mai, Mia, two Mies, Me and May.